Brat summer may be over - but that doesn't mean the bratty games have to stop altogether! A brat loves to play with fire and to challenge their counterpart. She keeps the brat tamer on their toes with her rebellious behavior and is reluctant to let them tame her. She not only pushes her top to their limits, but also adds a good dose of spice to the BDSM session.
What is a Brat in BDSM?
Next to the meaning that hyper-pop queen Charli XCX has brought to the term, it has long been a thing in BDSM. In brat play, an adult person voluntarily takes on the role of the so-called brat. A brat is someone who behaves, well, in a bratty way - cheeky, spoiled, audacious, whatever you want to call it. As the term brat is gender-neutral, a brat can be female, non-binary or male. However, the vast majority of brat play consists of female brats with male counterparts - the brat tamers. This term can also be used for all genders.
The brat fetish is essentially a deliberately strenuous dom-sub relationship in BDSM. In a sort of role play, the brat tamer tries to shape the game according to his own ideas in his role as Dom - if he succeeds. Because his counterpart, the rebellious brat, is usually not too interested ina submissive cooperation.
The classic top-bottom constellation is characterized by the fact that the top directs the session and provides the bottom with pleasure through punishment or humiliation. Brat play, on the other hand, follows its own rules: As a brat, you are unruly, wild, bitchy, cheeky and not very obedient, so the brat tamer is constantly facing the challenge of establishing his dominance and his rules again and again. As a result, the brat tamer has his hands full putting you in your place and asserting his dominance.
Although the role play initially seems more like a mutual test of strength, the typical BDSM power relationship between dom and sub also forms the basis of the session here. Although the brat is usually reluctant to submit to the brat tamer, it gives her great pleasure to meet a partner who can tame her!
Brat Play: no easy matter!
In brat play, the journey is the destination: intense power struggles take place between the two partners during the session. As the brat, you increasingly try to manipulate the brat tamer and take the lead unnoticed.
But if you meet an experienced brat tamer who sees through your game, you will have to bear the consequences for your cheeky behavior: The brat tamer likes to make use of the wide range of BDSM punishments. To assert their authority, they can put the brat in her place with corporal punishment; spanking or using BDSM toys like nipple clamps are just a few examples, because the imagination of a brat tamer is usually limitless.
However, in brat play the psychological aspect is clearly in the foreground: as a brat, you very likely want a partner who can take you on and restrain you. Only a brat tamer who doesn't let themself get irritated by your topping from the bottom will be able to earn your respect and make you submit.
Topping from the Bottom means as much as setting the tone from below. In other words, the bottom or the sub in BDSM role play tries to get the top to dance to his or her tune through targeted triggers.
What appeals to the brat about her role?
What sounds exhausting to many is exactly the stimulation a brat is looking for: she pushes her dominant player during the session in order to find the alpha male or female who offers her the ideal dominance. For example, you can disobey the brat tamer's instructions by talking back and trying to take the lead through targeted influence. A dom who doesn't see through these tactics will look pretty old next to you.
Although a brat takes the submissive role, she has very little submission to her. She is a strong sub who will always try to take control of the session through provocation and manipulation. The more consistently the brat tamer puts the brat in her place, the more the role play gains momentum.
What does the disrespect of the brat look like?
How you live out your brat personality depends on your character. And with more experience, your repertoire of psychological manipulation tactics can grow steadily. As a brat, you can use the following types of play, among others:
- Provoke the brat tamer by talking back. He says: Enough now! You ask: Why?
- Mimic your brat tamer's commands. You could even try using different voices to make fun of him.
- Fidget when you are told to keep still. Why make it easy for him?
- You receive any punishments reluctantly (if at all) and only under loud protest.
- Be bratty. Stick out your tongue. Roll your eyes. Show the brat tamer that you are really not intimidated by their gestures.
Who fits the brat in BDSM?
While a brat claims that she is a sub who sets the tone, a dom, on the other hand, replies confidently:
As a brat is usually a well-established personality herself, she usually knows exactly what she wants in role play. This is why most brats prefer a dom who is confident and knows his role. In addition, the dom must not allow themself to be thrown off balance and out of stride, as this would only play into the brat's hands.
Who you end up with in the game also depends on sympathy and compatible preferences. You may also want to live out different sides of your brat personality with different play partners. Playfully explore the dynamic that suits you together.
As in other BDSM role-playing games, it is particularly pleasurable and intense when there is open communication. A dom who prefers a submissive counterpart with a penchant for serfdom, for example, will be no good for you as a brat and vice versa. Therefore, make sure you talk to your partner before the session. Share your expectations and, above all, your no-gos!
Brats who act in the realms of age play are often looking for a dom who exudes authority. They want someone at their side who can command their respect and whom they can look up to.
Whether and when sex takes place between a brat and brat tamer is not fixed. The condition is that the brat tamer must first successfully tame you before he can even remotely think about having sex with you. However, once the brat tamer has proven himself, he can also become a brat lover through your favor. The boundaries are often blurred here.
What do you need to look out for?
As per usual in BDSM, the role play must be clearly agreed upon by both parties in advance. However, this does not mean that brat and brat tamer draw up an exact schedule for the session, which is then worked through. First and foremost, it means that both partners explain their limits and preferences to each other, and that consent it established for what's about to happen.
The behaviour of the brat is sometimes guided by the fact that the brat tamer does not simply surrender during the session and gives the brat the upper hand. By speaking clearly, you and your opponent know that the thrill of the game lies in the challenge - for both sides, because as a brat you enjoy making life difficult for your brat tamer.
But even as a brat, you can't take everything for granted. If you go too far in your rebelliousness in role play, this cannot only be a pleasure killer for the brat tamer, but can also lead to damaged self-esteem. In the worst case scenario, the brat tamer feels offended in his role as a dom, neither consensually nor playfully. As always: SSC is essential - Safe, Sane, Consensual.
Even a brat tamer, no matter how annoyed he is, must not overstep the mark and never resort to measures that exceed the limits set by the brat. To prevent misunderstandings, it is therefore not only important for both partners to discuss their kink thoroughly, but also to agree on a safeword that means the immediate termination of the action in an emergency.
How do I know if I am a brat?
Do you already have a smile on your lips? Are you tempted to challenge the true dominance of your counterpart? Are you just waiting to be tamed by a strong hand? Then you're probably a brat who's just waiting to be shown their limits by her brat tamer!
Does brat play turn you on? What do you like about it? Share in the forum!
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