Pegging refers to the type of play in which the woman penetrates the man with a strap-on (strap-on dildo) and, at best, makes him come through anal stimulation of the prostate. A ride into an undreamt-of sensual wonderland - for those men and women who dare. We asked JOYclub members about their experiences and explain how to do it.
That's why you should try pegging!
Women to power!
Pegging is only satisfying for men? Far from it. Taking the man, the pleasure of his vulnerability, of being at his mercy, the opportunity to emphasize your own sense of dominance with a peg. Women using strap-ons speak of a tremendously intense cinematic experience.
The huge range of sex toys also provides plenty of stimulation for the clitoris and vagina. Pegging allows the woman to be the trigger for the man's lust in an even more concrete way.
Because he wants to be taken care of
Maybe he just doesn't know it yet. For the men, the sexual fantasy also plays a decisive role. Many men report how much the mere idea of being taken excites them. In the realization of this fantasy, the physical stimulation of the prostate is added, which triggers a more intense orgasmic sensation than conventional stimulation.
Because you learn more about each other
Another powerful argument: such a change of perspective/role reversal can open up new perspectives. These - as the sparrows whisper from the rumpled beds - open up a greater understanding and a more pronounced empathy. Especially when it comes to the other sex's part in the act.
Preliminary conclusion: Pegging is a playground for men who are big enough to give up their supposedly unique selling point as a penetrator in favor of a fantastic experience. And for women who also want to rule with a sceptre.
If your pegging experience is painful despite extensive stretching and warming, get a medical check-up. Then something else could be the cause.
How to start: Talk to each other about your sexual fantasies
The first important step is - men, don't be alarmed - communicating with your pegging partner. "How do I tell my girlfriend?" is one of the most frequently asked questions when it comes to a man's desire to try pegging. There are also ladies who keep their fantasies to themselves, as some men quickly feel that they are stepping on a heterosexual toe. So: Communicate openly and without shame and perhaps you will open the door to some of your partner's hidden desires.
Incidentally, this communication is not just about checking whether you can imagine playing the game together. The main focus is on sharing wishes and concerns.
What do you need for pegging?
Without lubricant, no pegging. Those are the rules. And lots of lubricant. When you think you've had enough, use more. Yes, that much lube. Rubber gloves can take away initial inhibitions.
A tip for beginners: Use anal sprays or gels to relax the sphincter muscle. On the one hand, they allow a more relaxed penetration, on the other hand, oils prevent the skin from tearing.
Please note that pain is an important indicator of how the body is feeling and anal sprays and gels are under no circumstances a substitute for extensive stretching of the anus!
And of course a strap-on is not bad. Because the strap-on community is so diverse, you can find out more about this topic under the keyword anal toys. A tip right here: Don't skimp. Neither on the dildo nor on the harness. At worst, it will spoil the experience.
For this unfamiliar exchange of roles (or simply positions), you need an encouraging dose of trust. If you are still inexperienced in this area, put yourself in positions that you are not familiar with and see and experience your partner in a new role.
The aim of this stage is to create a trusting, safe and sensual atmosphere that allows you both to let go and surrender to the experience and sensations.
So what should you get?
- a good quality strap-on
- disposable gloves
- anal spray
- lubricant
- even more lubricant
How to optimally prepare for pegging
Before venturing into pegging, there are a few initiations and anal explorations that can make the process easier and enrich the experience. Going from zero to pegging is doable, but can trigger panic-like flight reflexes. It doesn't have to be a five-year plan, but why not take an enjoyable approach in stages?
To the gentlemen: Practice solo
Men who had previously worked in the field of anal masturbation and prostate massages (at best as a couple) have a clear advantage when it comes to expressing their desire and carrying it out.
Make your own explorations. The man explores his anal pleasure sensitivity, stretches the sphincter and acquires essential territorial knowledge, which he passes on to the woman. This is what these explorations can look like:
- Treat yourself to a perineum massage.
- Make your first attempts to penetrate the anus with your fingers (lubricant and glove may help).
- Find your prostate.
If you, dear men, have now made sure that you want to try pegging:
- Use an anal toy to help you.
- Try out the strap-on used in couples play on your own.
Find out what you like in solo play. And what you don't.
Involve the partner
As soon as you feel comfortable with your explorations, involve your partner in the anal games in the process. For example, explain to her where the holy grail of the male orgasm - the prostate - can be found.
Before she goes in search of the prostate with a strap-on dildo, it can only be an advantage if she has already used a sex toy to find her way around the target area. This also teaches her that a flaccid penis during anal stimulation does not necessarily indicate the man's level of arousal.
Thrusting or circular movements? If a clear preference has already emerged at this stage, discuss the desired type of stimulation. There is always room for improvisation later on.
To the ladies: Get to know the strap-on
No, you don't have to give him a name (most of them go by the name Wolfgang anyway). JOYclub member ImapUkua would like to give the inexperienced ladies the following advice on how to deal with their new playmate:
It's not about welcoming the strap-on as a new member of the family, but about familiarizing yourself with its sheer presence and movement potential.
A related factor for women that should not be underestimated: The thrusting and circular movements are a challenge for your pelvic floor muscles. If you want to support this with exercises, you can't go wrong. Easy to integrate into everyday life pelvic floor exercises train the "love muscle" and are an effective orgasm aid for women.
How to make foreplay a success
Give yourselves a foreplay padded with lots of patience, affection and lubricant. As superfluous as it may sound, it's still worth mentioning: desire and excitement will make your first steps easier.
A foreplay scenario could look like this:
- Shower together. This way you can combine the necessary - physical hygiene - with the beautiful - the first pleasurable assaults.
- Follow your usual foreplay with conventional sex, but skip the climax. Involve the man's anus more.
- The man shows the woman his solo explorations, stretches and stimulates himself while she gradually takes on a more active role and ultimately takes control with either (gloved) fingers or a small anal toy.
- She already has the strap-on strapped on. The mere presence of the strap-on not only makes foreplay inevitable, but is also described by many couples as an arousing moment.
- Talk to each other about when you feel ready. For some men, there comes a point when they can hardly wait, while others need a more cautious approach.
Which position is suitable for pegging for the first time?
Have you completed all the preparations, preliminaries and foreplay, have you got all the paraphernalia on board, filled up on lust and courage, told all your relatives that you love them and draped your will clearly visible on the kitchen table? Then you're ready to go. But in what position?
The choice of position should combine two factors at the beginning:
- On the one hand it should be a position in which the man can best relax and get involved.
- On the other hand the position must be easy for the woman to manage. The popular pegging position Doggy position which is popular in pegging, can be a challenge if there is a marked difference in size between the man and woman.
Three position tips for the start
Doggy: This position is ideal for the woman in terms of coordination, visibility of the target region and direction. Problems caused by the size difference can be solved with pillows or by switching to the bulldog position - the woman squats behind the man.
Bear in mind that due to the position of the prostate, the strap-on should enter the anus from slightly above for good stimulation. If the strap-on is bent upwards, it is helpful to turn it in the harness so that the bend points downwards.
Missionary Pose: The biggest plus: you have eye contact. This intimacy allows for direct communication. For good accessibility and opening, she holds his legs up or better: he puts his legs on her shoulders. A cushion under his bum also helps.
The slight curvature of most strap-ons makes it easier to stimulate the prostate. Important: Make sure that the scrotum is not in the way. Another advantage of the position: she has easy access to his penis if he likes double stimulation.
Spoon position: For the cautious. He lies on his side, legs drawn up towards his chest, she behind him. The freedom of movement of the woman's pelvis is somewhat more restricted here, although short intervals between thrusts are not advisable at the beginning anyway.
The position allows careful control on both sides. She supports herself behind him with her elbow, directs the strap-on with her other hand and he can guide her movement and intensity with an arm on her pelvis or thigh.
The first penetration
Once you have agreed on a starting position, the men approach the point that JOYclub member Henning1984 describes as the most difficult: Reaching your partner's butt.
So that such thoughts don't take on too much weight, you've had plenty of time to talk to each other beforehand. Before things get serious, don't forget: a sex toy that has just pleasured an anus is banned from any vagina!
Now it's time to get started. Important: The force required for the first penetration should be minimal. The woman plays around the sphincter muscle with the strap-on, applies light pressure and waits until the anus is ready for penetration. You will notice. The men will signal their condition by applying slight counter-pressure or moving away.
As always, the person being penetrated sets the intensity and pace! The first step is to gain a little depth. Whether you do this exclusively with thrusting movements or by mixing in circular movements, please whisper to each other in a state of high arousal. The stimulation of the prostate is often a question of the right angle. Remember: it's six to eight centimetres inwards towards your belly button.
Once you've found it, be nice to it. Basically, all positions used in conventional couples' sex can also be used for pegging. When you feel confident, conquer more new pegging territory. And the women should not forget to satisfy their own desires.
We have summarized the key points for you:
The straightforward closing words belong to JOYclub member ImapUkua, who sensitively promotes pegging:
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